Daily Bread

Aaaaahhhhh!!! This is all so crazy!! I mean, I'm leaving my job of eight years to pursue something completely new, after spending four years working on my family and our home, I'm moving them all in with my in-laws before taking them on three more MAJOR moves, and I've only two weeks of making income before I have to focus on other things (that cost a fair amount of money, I might add). This is INSANE!!!!!

And is hasn't come with it's share of stress. I'm deeply scared about what all this is going to bring. I mean, this whole thing is a huge leap of faith for all of us. When I look at other pastors, it's really hard to see me fitting in with them. I've never been all that close with my in-laws, and now I'm going to be living with them for a year?!?! And after finally feeling like I'd found a home after Jen and I got married, I'm planning for four moves in like six years, some likely across the country. And when it's all done, I don't know who or where I'll be.

Yet, I'm still left with the feeling that all of this --the move, the seminary, being a pastor--it's all what God wants me to do.

Recently, however, Jen and I have come to some realizations.

I essentially put in my notice at work and faced my boss and fellow employees' questions and comments about my decision because I knew I couldn't work full time and get all of the studying done that I need to before next year. What I didn't know is how we'd pay for any of that or anything else for that matter without me working.

But God saw our need, and He met it. Last week, Jen was offered what could arguably be a dream position for her right now in her career. At first we were happy just to know that she would have a job, but upon further investigation we discovered that her schedule seems to fit in rather perfectly with what we need for the next year, the benefits are better than mine were, and she'll be making more on her own that we ever did with our combined incomes.

We've been really nervous about moving in with her parents, the changes that will bring to our lives, and the adjustments we'll have to make. It's really been kind of depressing to take what seems to be a step backward in the growth of our family. But truth be told...there aren't a lot of people who have the option of moving their family in with someone else when times get tough, and there are a lot of people really struggling right now because of that fact. There are so many things we take for granted, and I'm incredibly thankful that God gave us the provision of a home with minimal expenses during this chapter.

I could go on and on, but I think you get the point. I need to spend some more time praying, thanking God for His provision. I ask for my daily bread, that God would meet all my needs, all the time. But now I need to spend some time thanking Him for meeting all the needs I never realized He's been meeting all along. Especially those deep seeded needs, those inner, subconscious needs, that I never even realized were there.

Thank you.